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Writer: Aaron Shure, Director: Randall Einhorn
Summary (NBC): Michael is surprisingly cheerful after learning some bad news about Donna (guest star Amy Pietz). The new parents, Pam and Jim, have trouble staying awake in the office. Meanwhile, Angela takes matters into her own hands when Dwight refuses to honor their contract.
The Office The Chump extras
The Office The Chump rating
In a poll conducted May 13-17, Tallyheads rated this episode: 7.94/10
See all The Office Season 6 ratings.
The Office The Chump quotes
Michael: You say radon is silent but deadly, and then you expect me not to make farting noises with my mouth?
Michael: We’re not going to die of radon, we’re going to die of boredom.
Michael: If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice.
Dwight: You were being really funny, and then you went too far.
Creed: Curve the bullet like in my favorite James McAvoy film, Wanted.
Ryan: Is there a curtain rod in the room.
Jim: Stanley, please, this is serious.
Erin: You probably shouldn’t keep a baby up that late, though.
Pam: If you get stuck and don’t know what to do, make a random sound effect.
Dwight: Michael! Nice tie or something.
Michael: Thank you. It’s reversible I think.
Angela: I’m going to own your farm by the time this is over.
Dwight: I will do legal jujitsu on you.
Jim: So we’re going to say the most likely scenario is that Michael matured overnight?
Michael: Oh, Hooters to Go. Nice.
Jim: Billy Joel Rock Band.
Michael: That exists?
Michael: She’s not invisible, so stop asking silly questions.
Michael: Is it wrong to keep seeing her? Depends on who you ask. I mean, if you ask her husband, or you took a random poll, yeah, it’s wrong.
Meredith: I have never cheated on, been cheated on, or been used to cheat with. I ask everyone in the room, “are you in a relationship?”
Michael: People, this is Scranton, and many people consider that to be the Paris of Northeast Pennsylvania.
Michael: In Paris, it is rude for a woman to have less than four lovers.
Michael: Real Sports with Bryant Gumball.
Michael: I am declaring a moment of silence. Right now. Ten minutes of silence honoring Michael Jackson. Just sit there and think about Michael Jackson.
Andy: My name is Andy Bernard and I am a cuckold.
Michael: When are you people going to stop casting the first stone?
Andy: You’re Ali Larter. I’m Beyonce.
Michael: I am Beyonce always.
Michael: I can’t wait to see this jerk who is making me cheat on his wife. I should punch him in the nose for what he’s making me do to her.
Jim: It’s really warm in here. It’s like a sleeping bag.
Dwight: I don’t have $30,000 lying around. I have it buried very deeply, and I don’t want to dig past a certain someone to get it.
Dwight: Five times for $30,000? Not a bad stud fee. Better than most horses.
Angela: Those lumps are cats, and those cats have names, and those names are Ember, Milky Way, Diane, and Lumpy.
Mediator: I can’t legally watch this unfold. It’s coming a little dangerously close to prostitution.
Angela: I’m not some farm animal.
Shane: Are you guys Kenny’s dads?
Andy: No. But we’re gay for baseball.
Michael: I just looked a man in the eyes and I shook his hand, all the time I was thinking, “I’m sleeping with your wife.” And you know who does that? James Freakin’ Bond!
Oscar: Why would you throw something wet at me?
Michael: You love it.
Michael: I am what I am, Oscar, and I want what I want! And right now, I want a piece of cake.
Kevin: That is a dangerous game, friendo.
Ryan: You know what? I think you’re attractive. And I want to sleep with you.
Dwight: I am an honorable man and I will honor the contract. But I don’t have to give her the good stuff.
Creed: He don’t give an F about nothin’!
Michael: I have got big balls.
Michael: A motel is dirty and it is sexy. Like me.
Michael: Okay, Morgan-Freeman-narrating-everything.
Dwight: Stop kissing me. It’s not in the contract.
Michael: It was either living with myself or being happy. And I picked… the… former.
Michael: I vow to never listen to my bodily instincts ever again.
Icon provided by pessimistreader.
Really good episode. I’m glad Michael came clean at the end, i was starting to get mad at him. I liked the dwight storyline, especially when he tried to kill off his sperm. From beginning to end, a solid performance.
I’m glad they actually went somewhere to film, and not use green screen!
I like the whole Dwight and Angela thing.
Also glad Michael broke up with Donna.
And Michael still doesn’t know about the printers.
loved this episode, thought it brought back the same style of seasons 2,3,and 4! Can’t wait for the finale
Wow. A LOT happened in that episode. The secret sleeping spot reminded me of Seinfeld, Creed had a great line, and Ryan went for the threesome. Hilarious.
Also, the callback to Toby obsessing over Radon was fantastic.
So many great moments in this episode. Some of my favorites: Jim and Pam napping next to Dwight and Angela having sex, Ryan trying to have a threesome with Erin, Creed’s talking head (he’s had a bunch of classics this season) and Michael’s moment of silence for Michael Jackson. The cold open was great too, for the second week in a row. All in all, that was a hilarious 30 minutes.
Loved it!
Loved the cold open. Brilliant! And some great little scenes and moments for everyone. Oscar’s “why would you throw wet fruit at me” made me laugh for far too long.
You all loved it again? Wow, I must be really off. Jim and Pam having to deal with the Dwangela sex was funny, as was Dwight destroying his sperm and Ryan trying to ask Erin to have a threesome. That was it. Another nothing episode in my opinion. I think I’m just not jiving with the Donna story line for some reason. Glad it’s over.
Laughed out loud the entire episode! Love Dwight and Angela!
Brigette # 9 – I’m with you.. I really wanted to like it, but just couldn’t get into it. Hoping for an awesome season finale next week!
This was my favorite episode in a long time. I thought the Ryan part was hysterical and saw it coming the second he got out of his chair.
That was a great episode, one of the best of the season. I loved the Baseball scenes…Andy was hilarious!
Dwight with the microwave was priceless! LOL
This was the episode that I saw them film! They cut soooo many funny scenes, so I hope they make it to the deleted scenes! Angela and Rainn adlibbed a bunch of funny lines during their talking head; hopefully they’ll be available to see somewhere!
This one was really good. I loved the cold open. That was Toby’s goal for so long and I was so proud of him. and that was just absolute classic Office right there. So good. :-) Andy was amazing. Dwight and Angela fighting was soooo funny! Pam preparing for Michael’s post-break up problems was so sweet. And there was some great Toby stuff. Overall, great episode.
I agree with the amazingness of all the moments mentioned so far! Great episode! I love the anticipation for next week’s finale; both the Office and 30 Rock have done a great job setting up for next week. As Angela recently said, “This is my favorite day!”
this was great! i have to say Dwight made my whole day!
i liked how they set the plot for the next episode
10/10 one of the funniest episodes all season! Too many great lines to post just one. For once Michael Scott did the right thing.
Looks like I’m in the minority, because for me, that episode was pretty meh. Which is a shame because I thought the last two weeks were pretty good. There were some good lines here and there, and the Dwangela negotiation was funny. But not much after that. Been a weird season. I think when we look back on season 6, we’ll say Jim and Pam got married and had a baby. And Jim was briefly co-manager. And that’s about it.
It was great! I was afraid that Michael was going to keep up the affair. I should have known my boy would do the right thing.
Dwight and Angela were priceless! Poor Jim and Pam were killing me, and once Darryl showed them where to sneak some zzzzs, here came Dwight and Angela.
And Dwight’s attempts to sterilize himself – my husband laughed out loud (and he doesn’t laugh readily).
Loved this — especially the continuation of plotlines from previous episodes (Toby, the baby contract) and Michael realizing what he’s done while driving. You can see it on his face! Well done!
Did anyone else notice that Michael’s lips were orange for most of the episode? Why was this?
In which episode did Toby stress the Radon stuff ? I don’t remember that happening. I’m just curious bc ppl say it was a continuation. Thanks
I loved, loved, loved the episode. So, so great.
So many great lines! Michael Jackson line, Beyonce ‘Obsessed’ part, Anthropologie book part, Morgan Freeman line, that secret sleeping spot part. Liked it a lot!
OH MY GOSH!!! I haven’t laughed that hard at an episode in a LONG time! Meredith’s “I ask everyone in the room ‘Are you in a relationship?'” had me in stitches!
Jim and Pam hearing Dwight and Angela getting it on sent me over the edge! HILARIOUS!
9/10. Well done!
I want Eagles inspired ice cream!
harvvv:
From The Surplus last year…
Toby: We should really have the office’s air quality tested. We have radon coming from below and asbestos in the ceilings – these are silent killers.
Michael: You are the silent killer – go back to the annex.
@22. harvvv: The Surplus
I loved this episode!
Haha I remember now. Thanks jimmy and ruben, loved this episode. Favorite part would have to be dwight killing bin laden, hitler, and toby. Haha
21. Nick Thu. May. 13, 2010 | 8:17pm
Did anyone else notice that Michael’s lips were orange for most of the episode? Why was this?
I did! I couldn’t stop looking at his lips. It was only his talking heads and not in the scenes, I think.
I also noticed Dwight’s hair seemed to be dyed darker in some scenes too. Did anyone see that?
I didn’t have quite as many laughs as last week, but it still was a great episode and sets up the finale well.
“I’m Beyonce, always.”
Funny that they referred to an Idris Elba movie…
@18 Dan… And the company went bankrupt and bought out by Sabre, and that their printers catch on fire, and Andy and Erin finally got together. I’ve liked this season. It actually seems to have a consistent plotline, where previously we just had a ton of random one-off episodes.
Wonderful episode. I’m pretty sure everyone had a line in it somewhere. We got a great taste of every element of The Office that I love. I could go into it, but I’ll just start rambling. It was grand.
My favourite part was when Ryan was all open with Erin. Ryan’s always been my favourite character, and it’s so great when we get to see him get past his insecurity, if only momentarily.
Just sit there and think about Michael Jackson. . .
This is one of those great office episodes that gets funnier the more you watch it. (and it was amazing to begin with)
This episode was great everybody in the office had a good line. The last three episodes have been amazing, so I really can’t wait for the finale!
@ 21 Nick, I noticed the orange lips too. It was really bothering me, first I thought it was because of the ice cream he was eating earlier or the cake, but in the car scene his lips were still orange.
Loved the episode; nearly everything has been spot-on these past few weeks. But I, too, was distracted by the orange lips! Glad it wasn’t just me. I’ve noticed that the makeup somehow seems to be off lately… People look waxy, eyeliner is often too heavy (especially on the men), etc. It’s a relatively minor thing and this show gives me little reason to complain. But it’s becoming ever-more distracting.
Other than that, this was one of my favorites all season.
@35 Yeash, the Sabre thing, but where has that gone? A couple of Kathy Bates appearances and one episode where the sales staff busted their humps. Aside from the addition of Gabe, nothing much else has changed. And that arc may be finishing up this week. Andy/Erin I’m trying to forget. To each his own. I’m still watching every week, and will be next year too.
There are not many moments in TV history funnier than Dwight nuking and drumming his gonads in order to ensure that Angela doesn’t get “the good stuff.” LMAO!
Funny episode! Kevin’s “Boooiinnnggg” killed me.
But agree the Michael-Donna storyline had to end.
Michael Scott’s man-boy character should give the writers a lot of comic freedom and surprised they went this route.
Wonder if Jan makes an appearance in the finale, now that Michael is again single and desperate?
I haven’t been impressed with the last 2 episodes, but this one was really awesome! I loved the whole thing. Andy was great and everyone, including Toby, had something to say. have been kind of annoyed with Pam this year but she was so sweet in this one. I just hope they do something with Erin and Andy next week so we know if they are together.
Such a funny episode. I laughed out loud at “I am Beyonce, always.”
What is up with Toby’s hair? I noticed it looked different during Secretary’s day when he was at the fax, and last night it was darker and kind of Donald Trumpish. He didn’t quite look like the old Toby.
2nd Brilliant cold opening in a row! BOOIINNNGG!
They have written Kevin’s character so great this year. I laughed the entire way through. This was top notch, old school OFFICE!
Was Paul’s(Toby) hair a different color? It looked darker.
Back to back home runs. But whatever happened to Bandit? Isn’t he allowed in the bed with the other cats?
One of my favorites this season. It was funny from beginning to end and was really true to all the characters. Ten minutes of silence for Michael Jackson, the threesome proposal, Phyllis cheating on her diet; I love everything about this episode.
This was one of my favorite episodes of the season. I laughed so hard the entire way through. I’m glad Michael had an attack of conscience and broke up with Donna.
Dwight trying to lower his sperm count had to have been one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen in my life.
Oh and when Michael was talking about the radon test and how he turned it over cause he thought it would moo, HILARIOUS!
About Toby’s radon rant: He first mentions it in “Goodbye, Toby” after he gives his little speech on stage at his party.
Big James McAvoy fan here, so I loved the “Curve the bullet like in my favorite James McAvoy film, Wanted”!
Michael’s lips were orange because he had been eating those orange slices he stole from the liitle league team. Come on, people!!
KUDOS BEESLEYRULES! Thank you, and Duh, to everyone of us who missed the orange slice/orange lips connection. :)
@39 My favorite part of the whole Sabre thing is that they brought Darryl out of the warehouse and into the every day goings-on of the show. I love Darryl.
beesleyrules truly does rule! Never made the connection between the orange slices and the orange lips! Good call.
What ever happened to Andy and Erin’s relationship? I never remember it being mentioned that it ended…
Great Episode, I was so glad to see that they are finally having the office tested for radon. With Toby’s luck the radon will only be detected in the area around his cubicle.
Ah, thanks for the clarification (duh!) about the orange lips! But I do still think the makeup looks WEIRD this season in general.
#55 Joe – Erin broke up with Andy in “Secretary’s Day” after Michael told her that Andy used to be engaged to Angela.
Erin said she needed some alone time. It is not clear if the relationship is over. Maybe the alone time she was referring to was when she was sitting on the bench outside the office building before Michael joined her.
Oh, now I understand the orange lips. But I do agree about the weird make-up lately… especially on Pam! She looks really different… not sure if it’s because of the baby or what.
Is Angela trying to get pregnant…or is she just messing with Dwight out of spite?
Opinions…guesses…